Affections & Motivations

I remember a commercial from years ago, I don’t even remember what it was for, in which a director is attempting to get a moody actor to cooperate with the script. Instead of cooperation, however, the actor storms off to his trailer after saying, “What’s my motivation?” It was funny at the time.

One school of thought in acting is that if an actor is to truly capture the essence of a character, he should discover the motivations of the character he is playing. He does research into the life of the character, finding out everything he can so that he can match as closely as is possible the reactions, expressions, and movements of the person he is playing.

A different approach is to depend on the writers to take care of the expressions and movements, and allow the natural talents of the actor to interpret the character. These actors play the script well, but don’t always know much about the character they are playing. They feel if the writers have done their job well, it’s not necessary to know anything beyond the script. They may even play off their own life experience or make up some similar emotional motivation to act the character well.

I think if we are honest with ourselves, we would admit that there are times when we disguise our true motivations, or we even deceive ourselves to make our motivations seem more noble than they really are. This was often the case with the Scribes and Pharisees in their seemingly well-meaning questions. On the outside they appeared to be searching for truth and learning from a great teacher, when they were really seeking to trap Jesus in His words. Like when the Sadducees asked about marriage in the after-life, when they were really convinced there was no resurrection.

I think it’s a valuable thing for us to evaluate our motivations for the things we do. Is this move really because it’s best for my family, or is it for my ego? Is this activity really for the kids and their good, or is it for my pride? Am I really not feeling well, or do I just not want to go? Is this purchase a need or a status symbol? I don’t mean to imply that any of these motivations are inherently wrong or sinful, but that we should be honest with ourselves when we make choices. Why am I doing this? Why did I just say those words? Am I being honest with myself about what is driving my words and actions?

Jesus had harsh words for the Pharisees as pertaining to their worship:

Hypocrites! Isaiah prophesied correctly about you when he said,

‘This people honors me with their lips,

but their heart is far from me,

and they worship me in vain,

teaching as doctrines the commandments of men.’”

Matthew 15:8-9

When it comes down to it, the Bible, while it holds out rewards as a strong form of motivation, seeks to draw our motivations to love for God. It’s our hearts He wants. When David was confronted with his sin with Bathsheba, he said this:

Certainly you do not want a sacrifice, or else I would offer it; you do not desire a burnt sacrifice. The sacrifices God desires are a humble spirit O God, a humble and repentant heart you will not reject.

Psalm 51:16-17

There is no greater motivation than love for God. Join me as I seek to set my affections on God and, hopefully, my motivations will follow.

Why yes, it IS love, actually.

I once heard love defined as giving someone what they need the most when they deserve it the least. Have you ever had to work really hard at loving someone? Have you ever known someone who was difficult to love, but you loved them anyway? It may have been a challenge, but wasn’t it worth it? They may have never returned your sentiments, but the love you showed them not only increased your own capacity for love, it gave you a picture of God’s love for us.

You see, our culture has adjusted our thinking about love. We have made love into a sentiment, a fuzzy feeling deep inside. So when the ooey gooey feelings go away or when difficulties come, we chalk it up to a love lost or irreconcilable differences and walk away. Or we choose to exist in a community of fractured relationships, friendships lost to disagreements and hard feelings.

Don’t get me wrong, I really enjoy ooey gooey feelings. I hope this doesn’t diminish my manliness in your eyes, but I really enjoy a good Romantic Comedy. Jane Austen and Lucy Maude Montgomery were two of my favorite authors before I was told they couldn’t be. For all you manly men, they were the authors of Pride and Prejudice and Anne of Green Gables, respectively.

I have these kinds of feelings toward my church. I’ve written before about how grateful I am to be here, how well you take care of me, and the way you love me and my family often overwhelms me.

I don’t mind telling you that I often have ooey gooey feelings toward my wife. Why shouldn’t I? She is a terrific and talented woman. And funny. I’ll stop there.

But what about when I’m tired? What about when the demands of work and family intersect and I feel like I have nowhere to turn? What about those times of conflict that make those positive feelings seem like distant memories? Is the love gone?

It is in these moments that love shines the brightest. It shines when we choose to love. It shines when we are patient when we don’t feel like it. It shines when we show kindness to someone who has just made us feel like dirt. It shines when we hold our tongue when we feel we have that zinger that will destroy someone and make us look better in other people’s eyes. It shines when we choose someone else’s interests over our own, when we build someone up who doesn’t deserve it. When we choose to let go of our offenses and refuse to exact revenge, but instead search for the truth and rejoice in it, that is when our love is tested and proven.

For more on love, see I Corinthians 13