Confessions of Matt Parker

I have a confession to make. I read teenage girl novels. I read all of the Twilight novels. I’m working on Hunger Games. I am not a teenage girl. And, get ready for this, I enjoy them. I realize that they are not the best crafted stories ever. I know that they are predictable and often trite. But I like to read them. I don’t know why, but I do, and always have. I read Anne of Green Gables and Pride and Prejudice when I was 12.

I’m glad to get that off my chest. Now you know one of my deepest, darkest secrets, and one of Misha’s favorite things to tease me about.

Confession is good for the soul.

I’ve not really been all that good at confession. I’m a fairly private person, and I want people to think well of me, to a fault. So I try not to offend against your expectations, and when I do, I try not to let you know about it. It’s also tempting, if the offense comes to light, to pass the blame on to someone else, even the person I’ve offended.

The older I get, the more I have the opportunity to practice confession. And when I do, I get sweaty palms and that jittery feeling in my chest, because when I confess for real, it’s not about a silly book I’m reading, it’s about things that require the giving and receiving of forgiveness, things that have the potential to harm relationships and hurt my reputation. But these would be hurt so much more by keeping them secret.

I clearly remember a few years ago when I was irresponsible with another man’s tool. I had to look directly into the face of a man I admire and respect and confess, and then ask for his forgiveness.

Confession is good for the soul.

I think we make mental assent of the fact, but when it comes to practice, we determine to keep things hidden and try to cover the dark corners of our lives so that people will think well of us. We project an image of how we want to be perceived, and for many people, the image doesn’t look much like the reality.

Confession closes the gap between our reality and our projection. Wouldn’t it be great if we really didn’t have anything to hide? Wouldn’t we live less stressful, more peaceful lives? Wouldn’t we get more and better sleep?

I’m not saying we should shout all the sordid events of our lives from the rooftops. It’s just that we often act like we don’t believe that Christ covered all of our sin. We act like there is judgment reserved for what we feel is too icky to be touched by His grace. Usually these things are what we judge in other people, but that’s a different article.

Confession helps us to experience grace in a tangible, face to face encounter.

Here are a few notes I’ve made about confession. Feel free to add to them or argue with me:

• Find a few people you can trust to reveal your entire life to, who will keep the information to themselves.
• Try not to leave anything out. The temptation is to go halfway, and thus diminish the benefit of the exercise.
• Your confessors should be people who will encourage you to do what is right.
• Don’t confess cross-gender with anyone except your spouse. There is great danger in that level of intimacy.
• If you need to confess and seek forgiveness from someone, do it right away, see Matthew 5:23-25. The longer you wait, the harder it will be.

There is great freedom in a life lived with integrity, and confession can go a long way in fostering that in our lives.